Ain't No Way
by iCrunch
Summary: New Orleans Don't Leave You,Even When You Leave It."
1. Chapter 1

**Ain't No Way**

**Chapter One**

**(Hey, You Know the Deal! I don't own Naruto and Never Will! If I did, Haku'd be Alive and Hot after Neji!)**

"Come on, Hyuuga, it's Mardi Gras, you gotta come! Everyone'll be there! The best roadtrip ever!" Naruto protested across the phone. I drummed my fingers on the counter of the coffee shop I worked in, watching as an old lady lumbered towards me on a cane. "Hold on a second, Uzamaki. How may I help you?" "I don't want anything!" Naruto shouted, and I guess the lady heard him because she shook her head and mumbled about loud-mouthed imbeciles. "I wasn't talking to you!" I placed my cell phone on the counter, it on speaker since there was no one here besides the customer and two other employees. "Ma'am, how may I help you?" She smiled, "I'll like one black coffee, cream and one sugar." I smiled, "Coming right-" "No, you should want a Tequila shot on Bourbon Street! Hey, lady, shouldn't he come to New Orleans with us!?" The woman stared at the phone, placing her hand to heer bosom, "And just how old are you boys?" I rolled my eyes and turned to begin making her order as Naruto and her conversed. "I'm eighteen and so is he! We're old enough, we're ready!" "Honey, that's no place for young folk. I lived there when I was young, got all that stuff: Drinking, Black Magic, Vampires. Y'all should be somewhere studyin'!" I put her coffee onto the counter as she handed the money over. "Aw vamps dont's exist! You don't know what you're shi-" I hurried and took the phone off speaker and put it to my ear. "Don't say that to her!" I hissed. "I could be fired!" "Well, you need to learn how to have fun! Come on!" It got silent for a moment. The lady still stood in front of me as though she were waiting for my answer. "Gaara's coming." My eyes bugged, "So! What's that suppose to mean!" Naruto laughed, "I know you can't think about him without getting hot and both-" "Shutup!" The old lady shook her head and sipped her drink as though this were some episode of 'Oprah'. "The way his sea foam eyes watch you from afa-" "Knock it off!" I could feel my face blushing. "And the way his pale hands gr-" "Ok! I'll go, damn it!" "Watch your mouth,-" She scanned for my name tag. "Neji!" I clapped my hand to my forehead, defeated. "When are you all going?" "We're leaving this Saturday! It's a week long thing, so take off for next week as sick leave!" I nodded, "Ok, ok." "Alright! Now, do you have Shikamaru's number? I've got to convince him!" I gave him the sleepy Nara's number and hung up. I was surprised to still see the lady there. "You need something else?" I asked. She shook her head slowly and raised her hand to rub her wrinkled temples. "Son, I aint's trying to stop you and your pals from ya fun, but New Orleans ain't gone leave ya'll even when ya'll leave it. It's a place that sticks with ya like a shadow from a street lamp. Be careful. And," her voice changed from a warning tone to that of flustered granny, "watch out for those girlies who flash themselves, oh, and pick pocketers and carpet baggers at the hotel you stay at!" I nodded, "Yes,er, ma'am." She smiled,"Have fun!"

"Hyuuga, come on! I called shotgun and Hinata's driving 'cause she knows the way better than any of us! So you got to get in the back with the other's, and Chouji just at a bean burrito!" Saturday morning had come quick, and it was way to early (Seven o'clock early) for Naruto to be yelling. "I'm coming, dang it," I mumbled lugging my suitcase downstairs and out the door. I got to the mini-van rented and threw my luggage into the trunk, slamming it shut. "I-is everything unplugged, N-neji?" Hinata stammered behind the steering wheel as I squeezed into the backseat. "Yeah," I replied. "Woohoo! Let's get going! Here we come, Louisiana!" "Shutup, Uzamaki!" Shikamaru drawled, face stuck on the window. Chouji sat, straining to keep his gas in, Ino kept texting,Gaara glared out the window because he kept getting vexed by a hyper-active Lee, Hinata looks nervous and Naruto kept babbling. And I- thougt about how I'd be in this van with them from Virginia to New Orleans for the next how-ever-many-hours. Yippee. "We are off!" Naruto shouted, Hinata revved the engine, and we were, indeed, off down the road.

About eight hours later, we were in a town somewhere in Alabama asking for directions at a gas station. "No! New Orleans! Where is it from Birmingham!" Naruto was yelling through his cell phone, it lacking on good reception. "Iruka, you need a hearing-aid!" He flipped his phone closed and pouted, "What if we're stranded here and kidnapped by dirty truckers?" Gaara grumbled, "You first." "Hey!" the blonde yelled. Gaara smirked as Ino hit his arm and told him how that was a good one. I rolled my eyes, "Guys, come on. Let's go inside, it's cold out here!" I zipped my jacket up to my neck. "Yeah, I need to buy a few snacks and a roll of tums," Chouji agreed and began to waddled towards the entrance of the small gas station. Shikamaru had never gotten out of the van, mumbling on how gas stations were 'troublesome'. I would've stayed in with him, but I really had to use the bathroom. We all filed into the small filler station, it smelling of pork rines, beer, smoke and water. An old man stood behind the counter, a mask over his face. I could've sworn the robber should have one on, not the clerk. "How are ya'll kids? Headin' down to New Orleans, ain't ya?" the gray man asked. "Yeah!" Naruto nodded quickly. "You know the way?" "Lemme see..." the others, besides Chouji and I, gathered around the counter, listening for the clerks directions. I went towards the back, looking to see if a restroom was here. It was, and, surpirsingly, it had stalls, only two, which was amazing for such a small place. I went to one stall, but it seemed to be jammed, and the other had someones feet showing, so I waited by the sinks. The toliet flushed, and a-guy?- a few inches shorter than me walked out. He had large brown eyes and hair that stopped at his mid-back, not beating mines, though, and his dark jeans adorned with various chains dragged against the tile. He looked at me and quirked a brow. "I didn't blow it up in there, if that's what ya lookin' at me fo'." I was surprised at his accent because it sounded-different, I'd never heard it before. "Sorry, but I didn't catch that." I moved over so he could wash his hands. "Oh, ya don't understand, what do ya'll call it: "slang"?" "No, I know what you meant, but, your accent-" "Accent? Well, it ain't much of an accent, but I'm from New Orleans. Just came from Manhattan from business. Name's Haku." Ok, there were a few things I felt seemed- odd: (1)Haku? That's more Japanese than...Lousianian?(2)Business? This guy had to be about six or seventeen. And (3)Ain't? Fo'? What the Hell? "Hey? Ya heard me? We ya headin' at?" 'Haku' seemed to be closer now. "Er, well my friends and I are heading to New Orleans. You know, for Mardi Gras?" A smile spread across his face and showed perfect white teeth. Two seemed a bit longer, but maybe he had to get them shaved down. (A/N: My aunt did that to her teeth, so yeah,I know what I'm talking about even if you don't! :P) "Well, of course I know where 'dat at. Just go ahead and take a piss, and I'll give ya friends some directions." I nodded, "Thanks." He shrugged, "No problem." He went to the door but stopped with his hand on the handle, "_But_..." He turned to me as I was going into the stall, "Could you and ya friends help me wit' somethin'?" "Sure...?" I said. "Well, out there, my ca' broke down. Could ya'll gimme a ride? I won't be no trouble." He smirked. "I shrugged, "Sure." He tilted his head, "_Thanks_." He left out, and I went in to "take a piss". You meet some weird people at gas stations.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

**((Some what "Yaoi" Action Going on. It's my first time writing anything-gosh, i can't believe I'm saying this- "sexual". So, be easy! (( I still Don't Own Nar-u-to!))**

We'd gotten back into the van after the clerk kept giving us directions that took us into Texas. We also had to hold Naruto back as a "filthy" truck driver "Kidnapper" came in asking where the restroom was. "I'm telling you, the guy winked at me!" Naruto said as he clicked his seatbelt on and placed his hands on the wheel. Hinata sat in the passenger's side now. "H-He probably h-had to g-go really b-bad, Naruto," she stuttered. "Woah, gotta impedement, don't'cha?" Haku stated next to me. "Chill, that's my cousin," I said. He bugged his eyes, "I can tell by ya'll eyes. They're pretty, by the way." It was cramped, so he was sort of 'in' my ear. Shikamaru took his head off of the window, "Who the hell is emo boy?" he grouched. "Ain't you kind?" Haku said sarcastically. Gaara seemed agigtated, and I didn't blame him. The van had gotten cramped. I sat near the right window, Haku next, then Ino, Gaara, and finally, Shika at the left window. Chouji sat in the trunk space (A/N: You know how the Explorer truck/van/jeep thingie cars are like?) munching on a bag of chips. "Shutup, you breath is on my face and it's smells like-you," Gaara shoved Shikamaru away, who happily placed his head back to its previous spot. "Look," Naruto started the engine and drove from the lot of the gas station, "you all are not about to complain in the back seat while I'm driving, because I'll take a shortcut and make us end up in-" "NARUTO, WATCH THE ROAD!" We missed convertible speeding pass. "Damn. But, like I was saying, I'll take a shortcut and make us end up in Kansas somewhere! Now, shutup!" "Well, I ain't fussing. My seat suits me just fine," Haku looked at me, and, not knowing what else to do, I nodded and looked out of my window. "I agree with Naruto, it's too early to hear you all," Ino said, pecking on her phone. "It's eleven o'clock," I said. "Exactly," she replied smirking. I'll never understand her. "Hey, why didn't Sakura come?" I asked realising the missinf person. "Aw, man, I knew we'd forgotten someone!" We all started laughing. "Dang, boy, you ain't so bright," Haku chuckled. "Besides his jumpsuit he wears back home!" We all snickered some more. "Knock it off!" The blonde had opted to wearing a bright orange hoodie and jeans instead. I laughed a bit more, "Ha-ha-ha, oh, man, ok, man!"

Night had come quickly. We'd switched around when we made it to Jackson,Mississippi. Naruto and Hinata now sat in Haku's and I place in the back, sound asleep with the others. "How much longer from here?" I asked Haku who stared straight ahead in the passenger's seat. "About two hours," he said. "I can take that," I smiled. "Yeah, I bet." I noted that, though we'd been driving for a while, he looked no where near tired. His dark eyes stayed on the road ahead. "Are you an insomniac, or something?" I know that's Gaara's job, but this guy looked alert. He smirked, "Nah, just excited. Been away from home a while. Can't wait and get back to my friends." He looked to me, "Are you tired?" I blinked, "No." He gave me the "You've gotta be kidding me" look and I started laughing, "Ok, just a bit." "'Well, don't got drivin' us off the highway," Haku said. "Ha, I won't. I just need to stay up." I turned the radio on, some rock song blaring out of the speakers. "Turn that shit off, do you know how loud that is back here?" Chouji grumbled from the back. I'd forgotten the speakers were in the walls of the trunk. I turned it down. "Well, I'll help you stay awake," Haku said. I stopped at a red light, one that I didn't see the point of since we were the only one waiting this late at night. "And how? Tell me some eeiry story of the Big Easy?" Haku seemed to stifle," First off, don't call it 'dat. And, secondly, no, but if you want me to." He shifted in his seat. "Well, it goes something like 'dis":

_Haku stood on the porch of his home,the smell of blood thick in the air. The front door was wide open, and a chilly air made it knock against its hinges. "Mama, Daddy, ya here?" He took a small step into the living, almost father lied in his own crimson in the center of the small livingroom, Haku's mother hunched over his lifeless form. "Daddy!" He rushed over and kneeled next to him. "Mama, what happened to daddy!?" His mother's head hung low, dark bangs covering them, and she chuckled lightly. "I knew this good for nothin' red neck was tippin' 'round with dat hussy." She lifted her head slighly, and Haku could see her blood stained lips. "Mama, you a'ight?" He placed a small hand on her shoulder. "Yeah, baby, mama's fine. Ya' daddy ain't, but we don't gotta worry 'bout him no more." She touched his hand. "Haku, ya' know you're special?" He blinked. "Just like me and your grammy." He didn't understand. "Momma, what'cha mean?" She looked up fully now, dark eyes teary. "Haku," her breath fanned across the boy, a metallic smell. "Ya know the movie...Dracula?"_

_End._

I pulled off as the light turned green, "That didn't really happen! And that was the worst story I've heard!" I laughed a bit. Haku smirked, "Well, it's foreal. Happened back when I was 'bout ten, 'leven." He sat back in the seat. "You're not a vampire," I said. "They don't even exist. I'm starting to wonder if you're that old lady's from work grandson or some shit." I took a sharp turn, trying to dodge a red light. "Why don't ya believe me- Neji." I didn't like the way he said my name. Something about the way he added it own as thought it were a way to persuade me to believe. "Dude, I don't believe you." He sighed. Another red light. "Neji, I'm tellin' the truth....Want me to prove it?" I drummed my fingers on the steering wheel to of what I could hear of the radio. "You're not a 'vampire'." "Guess ya do want me to." "Want you to wha-" It got eeirily quiet, and the light switched green. Shikamrau even stopped snoring. I sped off. Haku sat, staring at the side of my face. "What? Is there some-" "In the alley, where da light don't reach. In a brick wall, dere's a breach. Into anotha dimension," Haku whispered. I kept my eyes locked on the highway, but I began to feel a bit queezy. "What are you now, a poe-" "Curious eyes, they look within. And those eyes, they witness sin. In anotha dimension," he kept reciting. I wanted to run the red light we halted at again, but two other cars were in front of me. "Alright, cut it out," I said. "Hands and feet, they help him in. And now he be in deep to the shin-" He inched closer as I sat stunned. "Haku, come on, stop it." My stomach hit a summersault, and my foot pressed on gas, causing Hinata to stir a bit in the back seat. "-of his own desire. He goes in deeper, the slope gets steeper, in his body burn a new fire-" I could not move. The light had turned green, and the two cars had since drove off, but I still did not- wasn't able to-move. "In anotha," his mouth was by my ear. "dimension." "Gah!" I was knocked from my trance as I felt something sharp dig into my neck. "Ah! Stop! What are you doing!" I tried to push him off, but he didn't budge. "I told ya, that story was true," he was near in my seat when I saw blue and red flash in the rearview mirror. "Damn," I muttered. Haku brushed a strand of hair from his eyes and wiped the area of my neck that'd been attached. I looked at myself in the mirror making sure I didn't look like any form of a drunk. "Ya look a'ight," Haku smirked. "Enough to practically molest me with your fucking teeth? On the highway! While I should be-" "Everything alright?" A sheriff came to the window and shined a flashlight into the car. "Yes, sir, just heading to New Orleans." He scoffed, "I see. Why're you in the middled of the road while the light's green? You could cause a wreck. Your car broke down?" I shook my head, "No, just got a bit- side tracked." He peeped into the car, shinging the light into the backseat. "They're knocked out." He shined it in my face, and I squeenched, then at Haku. "Oh, your girlfriend giving you something special in the front seat? You know that's illegal?" "What!?" I nearly shouted. "I ain't no fuckin' girl!" Haku screamed. "Last time I checked, ain't no girl had a d-" "Look, officer, everything's ok. Honest." He nodded. "I'm gonna take your word for it. Now, drive careful." I nodded and Haku snarled, "Afta we hit you." "What was that?" Silent. "Good night, and enjoy Mardi Gras." I watched in the mirror as he stalked back to his car, turned around and drove off in the opposite direction. Finally, I gained my ability to drive. "What was with that stunt you pulled back there?" I asked, furious. He shrugged,"Shoulda believed me. But, ya gotta admit, it was nice." He looked at me and flashed his toothy grin, winking. I felt my face flush. "No," was my solid answer. "Aw, come on, Neji," he leaned over and prodded my cheek with his index finger, "I won't tell a-soul." I stayed focused on the road and Shika's snoring. "It ain't nothin' to be 'shamed of," he said, still going at it. "I find denial rather-sexy." He let his finger trail from my cheek to the place he'd bitten me at, pressing down. I hissed, "Damn it, that hurts! Stop!" This seemed to satisfy him, and he did it again. "Agh! Stop!" "No." I wanted to swat him away, but I might've lost control of the van. "Admit it. You don't want me to. If I let you alone 'dis minute, you'd get all lonely and would want somebody to talk to." I stayed quiet. "A'ight then," he settled back into his seat. "Have it your way, Neji. But keep your eyes on the road." I quirked an eyebrow, "And just why do I have to-" And I heard it. The freaking zipper. "What the Hell!" I kept one hand on the wheel as I reached my other over to hit Haku. "Don't you dare! This isn't even our car!" "All da better." I could barely see him out of the corner of my eye. He lifted his hips a bit, and somewhat awkwardly shifted to pull his jeans to his thighs. "Haku! Someone's going to see you! People are in the backseat, for crying out-" "Ah!" Gosh, no, this isn't happening. This is some fucked up nightmare. I watched as the dark haired boy panted, eyes half closed, in the seat next to me. "Remember, keep your- ah- eyes on the road." I was trying- i repeat- trying to, but it's hard to when you've got some guy you barely know jacking-off next to you--and clutching you leg. "Your nails, Haku! I'm driving! You sick-" This had to stop. I pulled off the road into a ditch. "Wh-what-" I hopped out of the car and rounded around to Haku's door, pulling him out, himm tripping due to his jeans and previous menstrations. "It's fuckin' cold, why'd ya pull me out here with you?" I glared, fed up. "You've been vexing me for the last hour, Haku! What the Hell is wrong with you? Are you high! Have you been in the car too long! What is with-" "Vampiro Chaleur," Haku said slowly. I blinked, "What?" "C'est le moment où un vampire ne peut pas contrôler son désir corporel." It was as though my brain were getting fried, "What? What are you saying! Haku?" I snapped my fingers in front of his face as he inched closer. "I'm leaving you here! You can hitch hike or turn into a 'vampire' bat for all I shit about! "Neji," he whispered. I stood planted to the spot as he said my name and wind rustled the long grass we stood in, goosebumps appearing on my skin. "Tu es magnifique." I didn't process what was happening, but I ended being pressed to the side of the car. "Neji," he breathed against my ear, shivers rippled down my spine. "Haku, you're sleep! Please! Come on! Are you sick?" I hissed as I felt him press his finger against my wound, "No. Are you?" I felt him smirk against my skin as he bit down into the already made mark. I scratched my nails against the van, "Gah! St-stop!" I moved my hands to his hair in and attempt to shoved him away. "Don't fight it-Ne se battent pas moi." "Ha-Hak-U!" His hands snaked around my waist and he pressed his forehead to mine, ""In the alley, where da light don't reach. In a brick wall, dere's a breach. Into anotha dimension. Eyes, they look within. And those eyes, they witness sin. In anotha dimension. And feet, they help him in. And now he be in deep to the shin of his own desire. He goes in deeper, the slope gets steeper, in his body burn a new fire. In anotha dimension." My mind- it went completely blank. I could see what happened, but couldn't do a damned thing about ir."Neji. Lemme be ya hands." I nodded as he took my hands into his colder ones and guided them towards his mouth. In my mind, I shook my head in protest, but in reality I just stood there looking as my digits slipped into his mouth. He stared at me, eyes glazed over. When he released them, a trail of saliva followed behind. "Such pretty hands..." He took my coated fingers and guided them to my waistband where my jeans had somehow been undone. "I told ya to keep ya eyes on the road." He took my index finger and made it trace my stomach near the waistband, me shuddering. "Neji," before I knew it, my hand had been shoved down the front of my boxers and wrapped around my member. My mind somewhat function, "Wha-?" "Aller mon amour," Haku whispered, and with his hand over mine, began to move. "Ha-Haku...." he dropped his head, hand still on mine. He used his other to tangle into my hair, burying his face into my neck near the mark. "Ngh..!" He picked his pace up, forcing me to do the same. "So beautiful." He bit into my neck and I winced, still not aware. "Mieux," was all I heard as I felt myself slide down the side of the van, the hot fluid sliding down my leg and Haku crouching before me, licking his fingers. "G'Night. And always keep ya eyes on the road, 'cause ya neva know what's comin'."


End file.
